Question 

I am wondering what is typical for money management at 90 years old? My mother has been handling her money up until now on her own. She pays her bills, does her banking, and decides what to do with her money without assistance. 

Mom does not have a financial planner, though she does have an accountant. I would like to take a look at her financial situation to make sure that she is managing well. I simply do not know how I should approach her about it.  

Mom has always been private about her money. She has not given us reason to be concerned, though she is of an age that I am not certain she can manage on her own. 

I guess I would like to know what the norm is for someone in their 90s. Do individuals manage their finances on their own? 

Answer 

There are plenty of older adults that manage their finances independently well into their 90s. Though it is likely that she could need assistance at some point. 

What you should watch for is that your mother is managing her affairs timely and accurately. Does she file her tax return on time? Does your mother pay her bills when they are due? Does your mother seek advice on investments or express interest in ways to invest her money? 

It is usually fairly easy to bring up the cost of electricity or some other hot topic related to current expenses. I recommend that you engage your mother in everyday conversation about these matters. Her responses will give you a window into how she is managing and if she is paying close attention. 

Without being intrusive, note if her mail is being processed, if her medication is being taken, if her household is being managed. Is your mother safely driving, eating meals, doing laundry, caring for herself, and managing her affairs? Does she act as though she has enough money for the things she wants to do or buy? If the answer is yes, then she is living her life without assistance at this time. 

Talk to your mother about how you are managing your finances. Let’s say you are approaching retirement or just entering it. Let your mother know how you planned for it and get her advice on making your money last for 30 to 40 years. She has most likely done that successfully and could be a good advisor for you. It will give you a window into how she thinks about money. 

Do ask your mother if she has made arrangements for someone to access the passwords for her phone and computer as well as her accounts should the need arise. It is likely that she has made that arrangement already, though if you know, you will feel better. If she has not done so, encourage her to do that. 

The time will likely come when your mother does need assistance with management of her finances. Most of us do need help in the last years of our lives. It might be helpful if you let your mother know that you will be there for her if she ever needs your help. At this point, though you should not press. If you see no sign of disfunction, there is no reason to intercede.