Question 

My parents are planning to either build or buy a retirement home to live out their last years and I have been charged with helping them find someplace to call home. 

So far, they seem to be looking at places that are a lot like the home they live in. They like the two-story concept that they have, just a bit smaller. I am not sure they are planning ahead very well. It is as though they do not think they will get older and less able. Every suggestion that I make is met with a no. 

I would like to know what they should be looking for when they buy or build. I am hoping that they will listen to someone that has a bit of experience in caring for the elderly in their homes. What things should we be looking for in a retirement home? 

Answer 

House design and personal care needs are the two factors that cause most people to leave their homes and seek a different living situation, but we do tend to gravitate to the familiar. 

We often buy our home during our child rearing years. We are in our 20s, 30s, and 40s when we take the leap and purchase our first home. Many times, we outgrow that first house and buy a bigger one. We give little consideration to our older selves, thinking just of our need to have enough space for the family and that fits our budget. We are able and not interested in an accessible home, because we do not need it. 

When our children begin leaving the nest and we are approaching retirement, we start wondering what type of housing will serve us best. Most of us would prefer to live in our homes as long as we are physically able but recognize that a large house and yard may not be sustainable in the future. For most of us, it will require planning ahead. 

If your parents decide to build and when looking at existing homes, there are design elements that I would take into consideration: 

• Stairs are the most challenging element for seniors. Most of us get to the point in our lives where climbing stars is not going to be something we can do. Even one step may not be possible at some point. On the flip side climbing stairs is good for heart health and mobility. Therefore, if you can build a home with a staircase that does not require climbing to get food, sleep, access the bathroom, or do laundry, you might have a winner. Do not buy or build a home for the elderly that has stairs to those four essential activities unless you are willing to install an elevator. Do check out that option, it may not be as crazy as it sounds. 

• Bathing should weigh heavily in your consideration. At least one shower in the house that you can walk into is essential. A built-in seat is very nice, though a shower chair will work if there is no seat as part of the shower. Do be aware that the chair will need to be moved about and stored, so a built-in seat is preferable. When designing, look for faucets brands that have matching grab bars. They are barely noticeable once installed because they look like everything else in the bathroom, and they blend in. Select a shower head that is handheld. Make sure the shower is big enough for two humans to comfortably move about, so the helper can fit in also. 

Bathtubs are less important than showers. There are walk-in tubs with a door, while nice, I cannot say that they are an essential element and may be undesirable to a younger crowd. I would design at least one bathtub in the home though, as people with small children use bathtubs, even if you do not, for resale purposes. 

Opt for the taller toilet and a grab bar on the wall next to it. Getting up without something to grab onto is definitely going to be a problem at some point. 

Make sure the bathroom has enough room to bring a walker or wheelchair into it and turn around. I would give up real estate elsewhere in the house if necessary to make sure the main bathroom is large enough. It can actually be quite beautiful if designed well and will not look like a handicap bathroom. What you end up with will appeal to a wider audience and be aesthetically pleasing. 

• Flooring should be nonslip throughout the home. Consider motion or dusk sensitive hallway lighting. 

• The kitchen is an area of great opportunity. Drawers and pull-out shelves make accessible items that otherwise would require getting on knees or bending down to the floor to retrieve items in the back. Almost every kitchen has upper cabinets. Realize that reaching those cabinets could be challenging at some point, therefore drawers that hold plates and glasses are preferable. A shallow pantry is best for food and kitchen items. Avoid a microwave above the stove, as reaching for it could become difficult and a safety issue. Drawer and under counter microwaves could be difficult to maneuver. Opt for a counter height microwave or built in at chest height. Consider easy to clean surfaces for countertops and floors. Good lighting and lighting under the cabinets makes meal prep easier. 

• When thinking about living space, I am a huge fan of a view. Birds, mountains, busy streets, people walking by, a river, or anything interesting to look at. The elderly spend a fair amount of time in their favorite chair and something to watch outdoors is priceless. 

• If they are looking at single family homes, factor in the cost of having the yard maintained by someone else. The cost can be considerable, and only a select few can manage it forever. The same is true of snow removal and grass cutting. 

• Another thing to consider is laundry. The machines need to be on the same floor as the living space, for obvious reasons. The stacked machines work just fine, even if they are in a closet. You may want a grabber as it can be hard to reach the back of the machines to get the clothing out for many. 

• If possible, the master bedroom should have a comfortable chair in it. This chair can serve multiple purposes. It is a place to stack extra pillows when making the bed, a place for a guest to sit when visiting a bedridden elder, a place to lay a clothing item to be worn again the next day. 

• Look for easy upkeep siding that does not require painting. Windows that flip in are the easiest to clean. Gutter guards should be considered. Elderly plus ladders is not a good equation. 

• Consider distances and spaces. Rooms should be large enough to use a wheelchair in but not so large that someone struggling with walking must take a hike to get to the bathroom. Also consider furniture placement for ease of access and chairs with arms that are easy to get up from.

This is a list of top things for you to consider when planning for your parents’ future home. Building or buying a home for your later retirement years requires careful consideration and anticipating what abilities a person might not have. It can be a wonderful adventure for your parents that provides them with years of enjoyment and minimum frustration if they take key functions into consideration.